Stand

The morning had just begun, as I found myself still in a fog, driving the kids back home after school drop off. Home. I wasn’t ready to be there. Because beyond the safety of this tattered swagger wagon, was real life. One that promised to challenge my deflated self. It was only Wednesday; how could I feel so beat down already? How could the world weigh this heavily on my shoulders? It’s not like I was fighting colossal life struggles. No, instead it was many small scenarios that seemed to spiral into my inevitable doom. Peeling apart each item and tackling it while in my four wheeled haven, proved to great.

I found myself numb, in a tail light, windshield wiping trance. The rain came down hard, as it beat down on the windows, it deafened my worries. All of the sudden I found myself pulled over in a parking lot, out of the car, with my hands raised, and the rain smacking my shivering body. On lookers drove by, probably questioning my sanity, but it didn’t matter to me. I stood there until it felt right. Until I had clear focus. Until things made sense to me. Until I was ready to face the day ahead. Then as a gust of wind kissed my cheek, I felt the Lord’s presence. In a tangible way almost. Like He held me whispering something so simple, but I clearly needed reminding. “Rest in me my child. For I will fight for you.” Why did I always view life in Brittany colored glasses? Why was it so hard to take them off and trust the Lord?

“With visible breath, I’m calling your name
With visible tracks, I’m finding my way
With a sorrowful heart, I honor this pain
And offer these tears to the rain
In a moment of truth at the top of the hill
I open my arms and let go of my will
And stand with my face to the wind
With the storm beating down on this sacred ground
If I stand for the grace that I’ve known
For what I believe
Then I won’t stand alone
No I won’t stand alone“

There was something so beautiful in that wet, sloppy moment. As the rain came down, it was sweeping away all the cares of the world, leaving a new rejuvenated, purified, woman. She knew what needed to be done. Where her focus needed to be. And all seemed to make sense…when her eyes were on Him. Her focus was no longer on how SHE could face the struggles, or how SHE was going to fix things.

“There’s a new pair of eyes to embrace all I see
A new peace of mind and it comes quietly
There’s a joy in my heart that you’ve given to me
And I offer this soul’s melody“

Friends, have you felt that way? Bills are piling up, your boss or co-workers are making life challenging, kids won’t obey, and you just feel disgruntled and defeated. Step out into the rain and let it all wash away. Open God’s word and feel His arms around you, telling you, “Child, rest in me. I will fight for you.” To on lookers, you may seem a little crazy. Who cries out in victory as they abandon the idea of self reliance, stands facing the storms, because they know they’re not alone? We do.

“So I beat on my chest till my song has been sung
And I cry like a wolf at the top of my lungs
And stand with my face to the wind
With the storm beating down on this sacred ground
If I stand for the grace that I’ve known
For what I believe
Then I won’t stand alone
No I won’t stand alone
When the thundering voices of doubt try to shake my faith, oh
I’ll be listening from inside out and I won’t be afraid to
Stand with my face to the wind
With the storm beating down on this sacred ground
If I stand for the grace that I’ve known
For what I believe
Then I won’t stand alone
No I won’t stand…I won’t stand alone”

A stormy day has never appeared so beautiful.

Are you stepping out in the rain today with me?

*song lyrics from Susan Ashton’s Stand*