Dear Texas DMV,

I would just like to take a second to express concern with your laws/system regarding expired out of state licenses. Yes, I’m sure you’re thinking, “Well you should have renewed your license before it expired.” And if that’s the case, then yes you are exactly right, however, I have three great excuses.

As you can tell from my blog (cause I’m so sure you read it) these kids are pretty demanding of my time. Also, I’m not June Clever here; my house is messy, I am rarely presentable, and my planning/organizing skills are almost non-existent. So it is only natural that I might forget that my license has expired. I mean for Pete’s sake, I would have to remember/plan for the expiration for 5 years, and that’s a joke.

But being the good law abiding/fearing citizen that I am, I tried to take care of the “issue”. Unfortunately, according to your great state, an expired out of state license requires me to take both the written and driving portions of the driver’s test. Fabulous.

Let’s not even get me started on that or I might explode.

Since I had no choice, I went up to the DMV 4 days ago prepared to take said tests when I discovered I was not allowed.

Why is that you ask?

Because Texas has a law stating that drivers 18-24 years old with an expired license must take a 6 hour course before being eligible to take the tests. No joke.

C’mon now.

I’m sure you made this law based on maturity factor. Like I established in a previous post; I am a wife, mother of 3 kids, and drive a mini van. I spend my days tending to children, changing diapers, wiping snotty noses, and referring fights. Not to mention I drive my swagger wagon like a 50 year old woman.

How many 18-24 year olds do you know that are like that?

*crickets, crickets*

Point proven.

Even if I was remotely okay with that law, why does it matter that I showed up 4 days before my 25th birthday? Will I be abundantly more mature then?

What was I to do?

Friday, on my 25th birthday, I woke up early and was down at your office. Cause we all know that is how we want to spend our birthday, right? I even got all ready and oh-so-cute for my photograph.

I know, right?!

I must tell you though, those 4 days helped so much, because now I’m bursting at the seams with maturity. Good call! 😉

While at the DMV and because I am such a sweet gal; I joked with the employees just trying to make the best of the situation. Finally, after a week of trying to meet your requirements, long line waiting, and a ton of paper work, I was granted the ability to take the tests.

Really, you are too kind.

As I was taking the test, there were many questions that I have never heard of. Seriously. So after spending a good 20 minutes on the test I failed it.

Yeah, you heard heard me right.

I failed the test by 1 question.

Tests are not for me. I get serious test anxiety, tend to over think questions, and both of those things make for a bad test taking experience. Thanks for making me feel like a 16 year old reject. It was greatly humbling and humitifying (humiliating + mortifying). I understand why you would be worried with my driving skills. For the past 10 years I have been driving and never gotten a traffic violation ticket. Seriously, look it up. Go ahead and tell everyone to lock up their children, hide the teenagers, and protect the elderly because this crazy driver is on the loose.

As I conclude this letter I just want to warn you that I will be up at your office again on Monday. Oh yeah, bright and early. But this time there will be no nice Brittany; instead it’s all business, so watch out.

And I’m not even going to shower.

Sucker!

Thanks for your time.
Concerned Citizen,

Brittany